Wednesday, January 11, 2006

About Face

Today, in the midst of my running around to get Em to school and her snack for her birthday finished, I also had to run to Kt's school to tutor. I missed the week before Christmas and last week, so I felt I needed to go. It was very disappointing and as a former teacher, very challenging...

This little boy that I tutor is in kindergarten and is way behind. At first, he was very excited to see what we had to offer, but now it is clearly apparent to him that we have nothing that he understands. In my last session with him, he was almost in tears until I pulled out the prize box. Of course, he was rather unimpressed with the bookmarks and pencils inside (I actually was, too!). Today I met with complete defiance right from the start. About the only phrases out of his mouth were "No," "I don't know," "I'm not going to tell you," and "Because I don't HAVE to." It was the most unpleasant he's ever been.

He shared with me before the holiday that his family does not celebrate a holiday. Today, when I asked him if he received any gifts over the holidays he said, "No." That was it. I asked what he did during the vacation and he said, "Nothing." (Oh, I should have added that to his few phrases of the day.) Apparently he didn't sleep, eat, play or watch TV the entire vacation (I asked!). He did nothing. Truthfully, I'm starting to get a little suspicious. Of course, these suspicions are being fed by other observances that I don't care to elaborate on.

I am totally at a loss about how to handle this situation. I don't feel like I have a whole lot of authority over this child - I'm just a parent volunteer. As a former educator, I don't see the value in forcing a child who is clearly not ready to perform to continuously be subjected to any and all forms of performance. I'm really torn because I know, from my previous tutoring experience, that our county schools NEVER retain students, nor do they recommend retention. The policy is basically "this child will," whether they are ready or not. So, in simpler terms, this child, who for 3 months has been unable to look at the letter C and tell me it's a C despite me and another tutor working with him twice week, must and will learn about 30-60 sight words before entering first grade. That would be by June 13th. That's that, and they are asking me to help facilitate this. I happen to think it's a disservice to this family, but I volunteered for this. Shame on me!

I really thing this student has witnessed a lot of anger, a lot of defiance and is finally expressing it in the classroom. It's possible that this classroom has been a safe haven for him. He's very secretive, avoids personal questions (which is highly unusual for a child 5 years old) and clings to his friends in class. I don't have any idea whether he has a learning issue or if he is just developmentally delayed. Since I've seen this progression from enthusiastic learner to completely defiant participant I am more suspecting the learning issue. I could be wrong - this is definitely no specialty of mine. I just see so many inconsistencies that I believe there is more to this situation than meets the eye.

I don't know if I'll be returning. I'll go if they want me to, but I feel like I'm not really helping this situation. One thing I've noticed about this public school is that the teachers rarely, if ever, give individualized attention to any student. It's difficult when the classes are so large! I don't know where this little boy will end up, but I hope they discover early enough how to help him.

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