I just returned from a women's Bible study group that I have been with for three years. It's a group that meets at our old church and it's these wonderful women who introduced me to Beth Moore. Actually, we all discovered her together. We've had our ups and downs, changes in the group, we've gone through some pretty serious stuff together, weathered many storms and remained friends - that's big for women!
In this group I am going through Living Beyond Yourself, which is the study I did with my church's women's group last year. In my church's group I'm going through Breaking Free, which is what I did with this particular group three years ago. (Following me????) I am actually looking forward to repeating these studies for a couple reasons.
First of all, God's Word is new and fresh every time I read it. I'm amazed at how many passages I have underlined, highlighted and even added exclamation points to that I don't remember!! Sometimes I even stare at them and think, "I wonder why that was so important to me back then?"
Secondly, going through these studies again gives me a chance to refresh truths that I had hoped to impress into my mind. I'm finding, after only completing the first weeks of each study, that I'm extremely forgetful! There's nothing like a gentle reminder from God, and that's what Beth Moore is for me. I'll choose gentle over harsh anytime!
Lastly, even though I've gone through each of these studies I'm finding new truths this second time around. It's amazing! I've also changed so much that I'm able to apply these truths in different areas of my life. I'm also more willing to admit to things in my life that I need to change.
This morning we watched the intro video for Living Beyond Yourself. These DVD's are really what I'm looking forward to because in our large women's ministry last year, they didn't play all of them and I missed many parts. This morning I felt like I had never seen this particular one before. In the end, Beth's point was that "Through the infiltrating power of the Spirit we can do things that we couldn't..." In our discussion I mentioned that so often we limit ourselves by thinking we can only do things we are "gifted" to do, or things that we are good at. Many times I've gone over a list of needs that ministry leaders have and I just can't find one thing I'm good at. I've never once thought, "I can't do that, so maybe that's what God wants me to do!" I mean, that would irresponsible! I've even thought other people "biting off more than they can chew" with my very judgmental and condescending attitude that many first children embody. I'm not sure how I ever believed I had the authority to make such a judgment, but I certainly never attained that job from God!
It's been 13 years that I have lived in Maryland and the honest truth is that I'd give just about anything to live anywhere else! I don't like it here, it doesn't feel like home to me and I've never made any "best friends" here. I can relate to the whole alien in a foreign world theme. God has slowly been revealing me what I was too stubborn to admit three years ago when I was "breaking free," too proud to admit when I was "believing God," last year but He has slapped my face with while reading about Gideon and learning about Israel's kings. It's time for me to give up my stronghold of substantiated discontentedness that I've always believed I was entitled to. It's really my high place that all other issues in my life stem from. It's what holds me back from stepping out to do the things I can't do.
I'm quite certain there are other strongholds in my life, but this one is glaring, and I'm embarrassed it's taken me three years to figure that out. I've always thought it was the result of all my other issues, but it's really the source. At the end of today's DVD, Beth has this point: "A powerful masquerading misery-maker is living within yourself." Amen. How does that powerful Spirit of God abide in our bodies with our miserable self-absorption. It's time to come out, to live.
I'm so thankful to God for being so gentle with me, because I really don't deserve it. I love to get the credit, to do it all myself, to be in control, to find that perfect solution without His help. It's just so self centered, its sickening. I think it's time to do the things I can't do on my own. I wonder what they'll be??
In this group I am going through Living Beyond Yourself, which is the study I did with my church's women's group last year. In my church's group I'm going through Breaking Free, which is what I did with this particular group three years ago. (Following me????) I am actually looking forward to repeating these studies for a couple reasons.
First of all, God's Word is new and fresh every time I read it. I'm amazed at how many passages I have underlined, highlighted and even added exclamation points to that I don't remember!! Sometimes I even stare at them and think, "I wonder why that was so important to me back then?"
Secondly, going through these studies again gives me a chance to refresh truths that I had hoped to impress into my mind. I'm finding, after only completing the first weeks of each study, that I'm extremely forgetful! There's nothing like a gentle reminder from God, and that's what Beth Moore is for me. I'll choose gentle over harsh anytime!
Lastly, even though I've gone through each of these studies I'm finding new truths this second time around. It's amazing! I've also changed so much that I'm able to apply these truths in different areas of my life. I'm also more willing to admit to things in my life that I need to change.
This morning we watched the intro video for Living Beyond Yourself. These DVD's are really what I'm looking forward to because in our large women's ministry last year, they didn't play all of them and I missed many parts. This morning I felt like I had never seen this particular one before. In the end, Beth's point was that "Through the infiltrating power of the Spirit we can do things that we couldn't..." In our discussion I mentioned that so often we limit ourselves by thinking we can only do things we are "gifted" to do, or things that we are good at. Many times I've gone over a list of needs that ministry leaders have and I just can't find one thing I'm good at. I've never once thought, "I can't do that, so maybe that's what God wants me to do!" I mean, that would irresponsible! I've even thought other people "biting off more than they can chew" with my very judgmental and condescending attitude that many first children embody. I'm not sure how I ever believed I had the authority to make such a judgment, but I certainly never attained that job from God!
It's been 13 years that I have lived in Maryland and the honest truth is that I'd give just about anything to live anywhere else! I don't like it here, it doesn't feel like home to me and I've never made any "best friends" here. I can relate to the whole alien in a foreign world theme. God has slowly been revealing me what I was too stubborn to admit three years ago when I was "breaking free," too proud to admit when I was "believing God," last year but He has slapped my face with while reading about Gideon and learning about Israel's kings. It's time for me to give up my stronghold of substantiated discontentedness that I've always believed I was entitled to. It's really my high place that all other issues in my life stem from. It's what holds me back from stepping out to do the things I can't do.
I'm quite certain there are other strongholds in my life, but this one is glaring, and I'm embarrassed it's taken me three years to figure that out. I've always thought it was the result of all my other issues, but it's really the source. At the end of today's DVD, Beth has this point: "A powerful masquerading misery-maker is living within yourself." Amen. How does that powerful Spirit of God abide in our bodies with our miserable self-absorption. It's time to come out, to live.
I'm so thankful to God for being so gentle with me, because I really don't deserve it. I love to get the credit, to do it all myself, to be in control, to find that perfect solution without His help. It's just so self centered, its sickening. I think it's time to do the things I can't do on my own. I wonder what they'll be??
4 comments:
thanks for sharing that, deanna!
i've never done a Beth Moore study, but always hear great things.
I grew up in MD...hyatts., did my student teaching at Burtonsville elem.
we moved here to NC about 16 years ago. my hubby would never want to move back, but the thought of being so close to dc and going often with my kids is very tempting to me:)
I highly recommend a Beth Moore study - especially in a group, although you can sign-up to do the online at www.lproof.org. We live quite close to burtonsville - I taught at Forcey Christian School. We're here because my husband has never lived anywhere else and informed after 1 year of marriage that he never intended to go anywhere else! Just a year prior to this revelation, he was looking for jobs on the west coast, so that totally took me by surprise. I was, and still am, ready to go!!
I think NC sounds pretty good to me!!
your heart for God and your husband is obvious...
it was encouraging reading some his blog that you mentioned.
noticed that on his blogroll is Barbara Nicolosi. I've been reading her blog for about a year at www.churchofthemasses.blogspot.com
she is encouraging in her heart to influence Hollywood for Christ!
Yeah, he likes that website. He used to laugh at me when I would tell him I was praying for specific actors/actresses. I just think what if just one of them were to trust in Christ - what influence would they have. After The Passion, he doesn't laugh at me anymore!! I've been praying for Madonna for years!
Tony can find some great stuff - you should keep checking out his blog!!
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