As some of you know, I'm a fan of this Disney VMK, or virtual magic kingdom, game and a message board full of people I've gotten to know and grown to love. I wrote about them about a month ago and the community that has been created by a bunch of "Disney freaks" that we are! I have made some good friends and have gotten to know some people "virtually" that I know I would have never had the chance to meet otherwise.
Above is the avatar used by an online friend, "Smithers," on our message post. I haven't a clue what it is or what it symbolizes - I'm hoping it's nothing too offensive. Smithers was well-loved by everyone on the message board. He was a father, an Aussie, a Harley-Davidson biker, a husband, a Chrissie (Christmas) fanatic and a friend to all he loved. He was very protective of the children who played on the game and made it a point to play with his own children on the game. He was always a lot of fun - I've not heard one negative thing about him!
Smithers posted at one time about what brought him and his family to the US - it was cancer. He had it and was being treated for it. When I first found the message board last fall, one of the first posts I read was "Smithers Went Down!" and I thought he had been banned or something. After reading further, it became apparent that he had been in a terrible bike accident and was bed ridden in the hospital. In January, he finally came home, still on major pain killers. We were all so happy to have him back.
It's been a couple months since anyone has heard from him and finally, last Friday, his wife posted that he passed away March 2, just one day before anniversary of my dad's death. It was sudden, fast, peaceful - lung cancer. On this message board, the grieving is real and like nothing I've ever experienced before. I've seen things like this online, blogging buddy's who rarely if ever met and then one dies. It's a strange thing, a different connection and a loss that is hard to explain to anyone you know.
For the past week, there has been a thread on the site to leave a message for his family. Kids and adults in the game have designed rooms in memory of Smithers, they have shared wonderful stories and have used the avatar above to show their attachment to this man, what he lived for and what he meant to them. I have many times this past week wondered what the parents of some of these kids are thinking. Do they understand or acknowledge the real grieving that their children are experiencing? Are they able to step in a help them or even recognize it for what it really is??
I have emailed with another kingdom member about this very thing, as her husband is a cancer survivor and has taken this loss very hard. He used to have email conversations with Smithers and had gotten to know him through his own children's (and wife's!) passion for the game. He, himself, does not play but he does understand the connection. We both have been thankful that there seems to be enough support online, but one never knows...
It is a real blessing to see the comfort Smither's wife has received through the board. I think she has been amazing, letting different kids know what they meant to him, letting others know just how much Smither's "Ohana" at the kingdom meant to him. He will be greatly missed - someone I never really met but sort of did. It's my first real online loss - but a feeling that I recognize all too well; grief.
Above is the avatar used by an online friend, "Smithers," on our message post. I haven't a clue what it is or what it symbolizes - I'm hoping it's nothing too offensive. Smithers was well-loved by everyone on the message board. He was a father, an Aussie, a Harley-Davidson biker, a husband, a Chrissie (Christmas) fanatic and a friend to all he loved. He was very protective of the children who played on the game and made it a point to play with his own children on the game. He was always a lot of fun - I've not heard one negative thing about him!
Smithers posted at one time about what brought him and his family to the US - it was cancer. He had it and was being treated for it. When I first found the message board last fall, one of the first posts I read was "Smithers Went Down!" and I thought he had been banned or something. After reading further, it became apparent that he had been in a terrible bike accident and was bed ridden in the hospital. In January, he finally came home, still on major pain killers. We were all so happy to have him back.
It's been a couple months since anyone has heard from him and finally, last Friday, his wife posted that he passed away March 2, just one day before anniversary of my dad's death. It was sudden, fast, peaceful - lung cancer. On this message board, the grieving is real and like nothing I've ever experienced before. I've seen things like this online, blogging buddy's who rarely if ever met and then one dies. It's a strange thing, a different connection and a loss that is hard to explain to anyone you know.
For the past week, there has been a thread on the site to leave a message for his family. Kids and adults in the game have designed rooms in memory of Smithers, they have shared wonderful stories and have used the avatar above to show their attachment to this man, what he lived for and what he meant to them. I have many times this past week wondered what the parents of some of these kids are thinking. Do they understand or acknowledge the real grieving that their children are experiencing? Are they able to step in a help them or even recognize it for what it really is??
I have emailed with another kingdom member about this very thing, as her husband is a cancer survivor and has taken this loss very hard. He used to have email conversations with Smithers and had gotten to know him through his own children's (and wife's!) passion for the game. He, himself, does not play but he does understand the connection. We both have been thankful that there seems to be enough support online, but one never knows...
It is a real blessing to see the comfort Smither's wife has received through the board. I think she has been amazing, letting different kids know what they meant to him, letting others know just how much Smither's "Ohana" at the kingdom meant to him. He will be greatly missed - someone I never really met but sort of did. It's my first real online loss - but a feeling that I recognize all too well; grief.
3 comments:
I am sorry for your loss. For some people it is easier to share on line then in person - your friend sounds like he was a good man and I am glad his wife let everyone know what happened.
My mom knew immedietly that something was wrong after I read that post and wouldn't leave me alone until I told her. We prayed together and I talked about David. My parents were there for me but I don't know if others were.
I accually sent him a PM about that avatar a few months before he died, I asked him if it had anything to do with motorcycles and he said no it was just a random picture he ran across and he liked it so he set it as his avatar.
Glad to hear that, Ace! And I ran across his avatar the other day on a site. Funny! I know you knew him better than I - I hope other parents are recognizing just how significant he was to everyone online.
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