Thursday, November 10, 2005

Disturbing

This article in the Washington Post about learning earlier if a fetus has Down's Syndrome is just disturbing to me on so many levels. I think that spending millions of dollars on research that would make it easier for women to decide to have an abortion easier just bothers me. To be honest, I'm not even sure if I agreed with the right to choose abortion (I don't) that this study would make me happy. I understand that having a child with Down's Syndrome is a lifetime committment. T, my husband, has a cousin with Down's who is in his 20's. His family will be responsible for years to come for this "child," but that doesn't really diminish his worth in this world. Ask any parent of a Down's child whether or not they regretting having that child - I think the answers would really surprise you!

Getting back to the article, or not really... when I was a sophomore in high school, I had an English teacher that I really disliked. She was a good teacher, but she injected some very personal feelings and views into our English class that I not only disagreed with as a 15 year old, but I thought were completely inappropriate to disclose to teenagers (at least in the 80's!). She was pregnant at the time, in her early 40's, married one of her former students... that might actually tell you something right there! But she told us this, "I'm having this fetus tested. And if there's anything wrong with it, I'm getting rid of it. Of course, an abortion is the only answer. I don't want to have anything but a perfect baby." As a 15 year old, I didn't need to hear that. As a 40 year old, she should have known better. I'm kind of surprised she's still teaching there! What made it even worse - her sister-in-law worked with my mom and had tried for years and years to get pregnant. She would have taken any baby as her own at that point, but instead had to listen to this insensitive woman at every family function.

When I read an article like the one in the Washington Post, it reminds me of how lightly some people view abortion. There's a quote in the article about how knowing earlier allows for women to make a decision to abort earlier in a pregnancy when it's "safer and less traumatic" for them. I can't think of any procedure being safer and less traumatic - let's not belittle what we're talking about here. Someone is acknowledging that they have a fetus that will most likely develop into a full grown adult someday with Down's Syndrome. Let's just get rid of it?? I think the power of suggestion is in play here. Are we trying to tell women that it's OK for them to abort because a person with Down's is just not worth it? or that it's their responsibility to act responsibly? What is responsible in this case??? because I think that's exactly what they are asking women to ask themselves. It's disturbing.

I have a friend who is in the medical profession who laid it out for me, as we dealt with the news that another friend was actually having a baby who likely had Down's Syndrome (she did - and she's a precious little girl!). Encouraging women today to abort Down's babies is really hurting the ones who are born. The fewer Down's children/adults that there are, the fewer resources and services they will have. They will lose their community with others like them. It will be more difficult for the families. I think she's right, and I'm disturbed. And truthfully, I'm ashamed that this country would spill millions of dollars into researching a "safer and less traumatic" way to provide abortions. Aren't there better things to be spending that kind of money on?

I also think of another friend of mine, who had the test that they do now to determine the chances of your child having a variety of "disabilities" and conditions. Her baby's test came back with a very high liklihood of Down's, at which point she began some serious research on the issue. She refused further testing because she never intended to abort and figured the testing would only provide a motive for further encouragement of termination by her OB. It was a stressful pregnancy knowing there was this possibility of having this condition and we all learned a lot!! In the end, her baby was "perfect" in every way. There is not one sign of Down's syndrome.

So my question, how do you really know? Are you going to trust a test?? And will these women question their entire life whether or not they may have aborted a perfect child?? That is traumatic. And for those medical professionals who don't know, ANY abortion at ANY time is traumatic - don't forget that!

2 comments:

~*Radonna*~ said...

"So my question, how do you really know? Are you going to trust a test?? And will these women question their entire life whether or not they may have aborted a perfect child??"

SO a perfect child being aborted is more tragic than a child with Down syndrome. Until this part of the pro life argument is changed you are not going to get very far. Amnio's are very accurate.

It is the perception of the value of a child with Down syndrome that should be the focus not that there might have been a mistake and you killed a good one.

deanna said...

Well, I couldn't agree more!! I guess my point is that EVEN IF you don't feel the value of that life is greater, would you still question whether or not you had done the "right thing" your entire life. I, personally, feel each life holds the same value in the eyes of God. My point here was to try to think of this situation "even if I did believe that abortion was OK (I don't)..."

I think that it's tragic that we go to such great lengths to determine whether a life should begin or commence at our own hands before it has barely had a chance to even develop. That's my own opinion.

At the same time, I do not want to belittle the task at hand for someone who has or chooses to have a child with any number of serious, detectable "defects". It's a journey I am personally unfamiliar with, but realize is very different and much more stressful than my own. There is no perfect child - even a seemingly healthy child at birth can develop debilitating diseases. Do we then decide we don't want them anymore?? No, we don't.