I am not complaining about the whole "peanut free" policy that a lot of schools are adopting. I think if my children had a possibly fatal peanut allergy I'd feel more at peace were they to be at a peanut free school. The reality is, however, that the more we shelter kids from things like this the less educated they are about making safe decisions. I never send peanut products in my children's lunch boxes (our school is not peanut free - YET) because they have friends who have peanut allergies. They sit next to each other and I've chosen not to be the culprit in any fatal reaction other children might have. I have taught my own daughter to be aware of foods with peanuts and not to offer them to her friends that she knows are allergic. I carefully choose any special treats I send in with this in mind, as well.
Where I draw the line, however, is where parents take this "peanut free" stuff to the extreme. Absolutely NO FOOD WHATSOEVER, anywhere, anyplace because they cannot control it. That kind of restriction is something I see as unhealthy for everyone. Slowly, it seems that we are becoming more and more governed by a few anxiety ridden parents, and the "peanut free" push is being exhibited in other forms, disguised so these parents and children do not feel like the "bad guys" all the time.
My mom, who is a second grade teacher, thought she had forgotten to have her parents sign up for the Spring Party they have every year. Instead, she found an old memo sent out by the PTA stating that they made a decision that the children at their school are too overweight and that there should not be any more parties. WHAT??? One party every couple of months is causing a weight problem??? How about sitting at a desk for hours on end? Doesn't that have negative effects on the weight of children? Or what about the junk parents send in lunches? Are we going to dictate what you can send in your child's lunchbox based on caloric intake? This kind of insanity must end! Let's not hide behind lame excuses - just admit that there are a few parents who fear for the life of their children where peanuts are concerned. And rightly so!
My sister-in-law had a friend growing up who was allergic to peanuts. I'm sure we all did, and never growing up did I ever hear of a peanut free school! Her friend went off to college and ate a brownie that had walnuts on top of it. She remembered to scrape all the nuts off the top but did not think about the oil left behind. Unfortunately, she did not make it to the hospital in time and did not have an epi-pen with her - something she was never taught to do anyway. Her life was snuffed by lack of judgement and being faced with decisions that were previously only made by mom. I don't think it's necessary to scare kids out of their wits, but I think some education on the fatal effects of certain allergies AND some lifestyle training for kids with these allergies is a great idea!
Here's an excerpt from the latest PTA Newsletter from my daughter's school. The PTA president had this to say:
Current studies indicate that by 2010 nearly half the children in North and South American will be overweight... I can obviously monitor what they eat at home, but what happens when they are at school? They are offered birthday snacks, candy, and pizza in addition to the lunches they bring from home or purchase at school.... Parents of children with food allergies also have concerns.... The students who suffer from food allergies are often unable to eat the treats that are offered to them. As a result, these students may feel left out when others bring in food to share that they cannot eat.... When your child has a birthday, consider sending in a present for the classroom in lieu of cupcakes, cookies, and goody bags filled with candy.This is only a small portion of her letter, but I think you get the point. No more parties - that's the bottom line. The "no fun, no party" atmosphere is taking over everywhere in schools. It's an epidemic. And it all centers around peanut allergies.
I don't know that anyone has ever noticed, but kids have all kinds of allergies. My daughter is allergic to mold, mildew, dust, pollen, animals... Other children have diabetes, are hypoglycemic, latex allergies. Should we instate a no animal field trips, no vaccuuming or cleaning, no flowers or balloons in the building, no outdoor activities in fall and spring policy at the school? Will this effect the science curriculum? I don't know. I would assume so. Instead, we just teach our children what to avoid, how to live with their condition and life goes on.
My daughter, who has some serious asthma, was permitted by me "with caution" to participate in a program by the fire department where they filled a room with smoke and taught the children what to do and how to get out. I recognized there was some risk to her, that she would likely need her inhaler. However, I also felt it was important that she learn what to do should she ever find herself in that situation. A fire starts whether you have asthma or not, so why not find out what that feels like and what to do. Peanuts will be everywhere in the world - no one is going to stop growing, baking with or serving peanuts because your child is allergic to them. It's just unrealistic to think that you can change the world based on your child's needs. It's not going to happen.
So, the email I got today said something like this: We have decided not to offer any peanut-based products. Is there another kind of cookie you can make? My answer: Well, not really. I only make peanut butter and chocolate chip, which they don't need. But thanks for feeding the blog story that's been rolling around in my head for months. It's the perfect time to pound it out, while I'm wondering why adults can't figure out what they can and cannot eat at an adult volunteer brunch...
12 comments:
Bravo! Stay on that soap box - you make a lot of sense.
When I was younger it didn't seem to be much of a proplem if a child had an allergy - they were taught what to stay away from. Has the world changed so much?
Thanks - it's been stewing for a while, just today it overflowed... What I didn't mention was that both my girls went to a peanut free - NOT FOOD FREE - preschool where the occasional Oreo cookie or cupcake was not frowned upon. We definately need to balance what the kids get, but to forego any sweet treats just seems really unreasonable to me. Teach our kids how to make good decisions!! instead of making them want this junk all the more!
Great post! Here's my two cents on the very same subject: http://phoenixrising.typepad.com/weblog/2006/04/pass_the_peanut.htm
l It's about the insane ban on peanuts on commercial airline flights...
Well, a peanut allergic person should probably not eat anything at a brunch like that - too risky.
But even if they could question the chefs of the individual dishes at the brunch and determine what is safe, having those peanut cookies there really makes it unsafe for them to be there at all, due to cross-contamination issues. A safe decision for a contact sensitve PA person may mean that they cannot attend the event at all. Hopefully most people would rather serve a different cookie than see people excluded because of a cookie flavor.
Peanut allergies differ from other allergies in that a very minute amount of peanut protein can cause a reaction (even just fumes in some cases)and you never know how serious a reaction will be.
As the mother of a peanut allergic child, I will certainly teach my son how to avoid peanut products instead of living in a peanut-free bubble yet of course, I'd still like to see fewer peanut dishes at public functions.
I hope when it's time for my son to go to school, that parents of his classmates are as sensitive as you are to the issue, in trying not to send to many peanut products in lunches.
I don't know if you truly understand how devastating it is to be a mother of a child allergic to nuts. My one-year-old son put a cashew in his mouth and promptly spit it out. However, within seconds, he was covered with hives and having difficulty breathing. This was his first reaction, and after a trip to the ER and to an allergist, we were informed that his next reaction could be deadly within minutes. I can control his environment here at home and at relatives' houses,and we have Epi pens wherever he goes, but I will be a nervous wreck when he goes to school. So many baked goods are made in places where they could be contaminated by nuts, even it the baked goods don't contain nuts themselves.
I am a teacher myself, and if I had a child in my class with nut allergies, I would make my classroom a nut-free zone. I don't think that's extreme at all. Most allergies are not as fatal as nut allergies, so it really isn't fair to compare it to other allergies.
I just wish that people would understand how serious this is. It's not too difficult to educate yourself on something like this, and to realize how easily potentially deadly reactions can be prevented.
Yup - nut-free is fine with me, that's not really what I'm addressing... my daughter's both went to a nut-free preschool - but they still had snack everyday! I'm sure you would agree that there are safe foods for children with nut allergies. In fact, I'm one of the very few parents at our elementary school who would not have a problem with a nut-free school, however that is not what the parents of the children with those allergies are asking for. They want a sweet-free, nut-free school where they not only dictate the foods you CAN send in, but where you can buy them. No kidding, I was told that for our Holiday Party in kindergarten, we could only buy DOT candy at Target. That just seems a bit extreme to me and I really think it's getting out of hand when a few dictate down the dollar point where you can purchase food items.
I do think there is a difference between a nut allergy and some other allergies, but what about the child at our school who has peanut-like reactions to eggs??? Do we stop allowing parents to send in food items that contain eggs??? Do you know what that would mean for you, even being a parent whose child already has a nut allergy to be told that you cannot send in any food item containing eggs??? Fortunately, this parent sees this whole thing very differently than the few peanut parents, and we've not once been told to avoid sending in egg products, although I'm quite certain that she could hold the same fear.
Peanut allergic reactions have not changed from the time I was a kid, but the power of parents over the school environment, and all other environments, has changed tremedously. That is unfortunately having an effect on the vast majority of parents who don't have to worry about this allergy. I have not once sent in a food item containing peanuts or even made in places where there are peanuts, yet my FRIENDS who know this still do not trust me. I guess that's the result of a fear that has been ingrained in them from doctors? I have no clue, but I don't ever recall facing anything like this back when I grew up.
My other issue with these parents is their refusal to accept a peanut free table in our school cafeteria. They are claiming that their children have been emotionally scarred by not be able to be with their friends or not partake of "goodie bags" because there might possibly be peanuts. They refuse to provide an acceptable list of peanut safe treats, instead insisting that no one get food or goodies of any kind. In many ways, they are alienating their children by doing this. A peanut free table doesn't have to be a peanut allergy table - it's just a table where kids who don't have peanut products in their lunches (like my daughter - who is not allergic but NEVER has anything containing peanuts).
When I think back to my days in elementary school or even my days of teaching, I can honestly say that the parties stick out - they were fun, different and many times involved foods I had never tried before, like potato pancakes for Hanukkah. Those days are being lost in a food-free, fun-free zone. I happen to this it's a huge loss for this generation.
From other posts on your blog, it seems that you're a Christian yet I don't see a Christian attitude in your reaction here. Please try not to be so angry at these parents and think about what they face. I'm not an 'extreme' PA parent yet I face the same fears as every other PA parent - we just deal with it differently. All of us however, only have the best interest of our children in mind. I'm not saying that you should easily go along with the extreme measures you mention but the anger and defensiveness isn't helping anyone. Be thankful you don't live with the crippling fear that some PA parents live with. I fight this everyday and try to have faith because I don't want my son to live in fear when he's old enough to understand.
I do think things have changed in regards to incidences of allergies although I don't have a scientific defense of this. But I knew of no one with food allergies growing up and I have one PA nephew, one nut allergic nephew, my son is PA and everywhere I turn I discover children with food allergies. When you think about how much our immune systems and diets have changed over just the past few generations, it's not a big stretch to think it's possible that something is up.
Hmmm... interesting... so Christians should comply to all demands of every parent.. I'll have to mull over that one.
Unlike you, I went to elementary school in the 70's with many peanut allergic children. I also had friends who were allergic to chocolate - which I don't think is as common as it used to be. I don't recall ever having the parents of students with peanut allergies being able to dictate each and every morsel of food in the schools. In fact, I do remember those parents NOT sending their children to school on days when there might possibly be peanuts in the classroom.
I think the times have changed and I for one (even without peanut allergic children) am all for a peanut free zone, but, as I've said repeatedly, even when you introduce that idea, the parents are not happy. What will it take to make them happy? As they have stated to us on more than one occassion - absolutely NO FOOD anywhere but the cafeteria and ONLY NATURAL food in the cafeteria. Personally, I think this is drastic. In all the years the school has not even been peanut free, there have been no allergic reactions at the school.
As for MY EXAMPLE IN MY POST, this is a brunch for ADULTS ONLY. Do adults who have a peanut allergy know who to determine whether or not food is safe for them?
No, Christians shouldn't comply to all demands of every parent which is why I wrote "I'm not saying that you should easily go along with the extreme measures you mention".
As for the adult brunch, please re-read my first comment:
"having those peanut cookies there really makes it unsafe for them to be there at all, due to cross-contamination issues. A safe decision for a contact sensitve PA person may mean that they cannot attend the event at all. Hopefully most people would rather serve a different cookie than see people excluded because of a cookie flavor."
It's not a simple matter of a PA person picking and choosing what is safe. And sensitivity can increase with age so adults may be even more prone to contact reactions. So yes, adults can make their own decisions which may mean not attending - you'd rather have the pb cookies than fellow church members at the brunch????? Why all the hostility over the cookies? There are hundreds of varieties of non-peanut, non-nut cookies a person could make. If you can make pb cookies, you can make sugar cookies, shortbread cookies, fudge drops, etc. It sounds childish to say that you couldn't possibly make anything but PB cookies.
Ah... so you are also another anonymous commenter. I never connected you to the other comment!! It would help if I had some way of identifying you!!
The issue of "cross contamination" is really at the heart of this issue, I think. I guess they way I feel is why not just serve the peanut butter cookies - I mean, these parents in question at the elementary school have issue with all foods that come out of a home that has peanuts or peanut butter for this reason. In other words, no food coming from a home where there is peanut butter or peanuts is safe. They don't trust any baked goods. Nothing. This being the case, they would not be happy with any of the items on the list (and we're talking LOTS of food - enough for 300+ people), except for the fruit and veggies, which still they might not trust if they were peeled, cut and prepared in someone's home.
I think you have this idea that I think ALL parents of PA children are like this - I don't. I have plenty of friends who are not this neurotic. It's the few who are who are slowly dictating all food choices everywhere we go.
Another commenter wrote a post on her blog about an airline being unable to serve peanuts on a flight due to one person on the plane having an allergy to peanuts. Because of this, the snack choices were extremely limited. There was apparently no warning - just these people showing up and demanding that this need be met. I say plan ahead - notify the airline. But also - what about cross contamination? Who is responsible for the spilled peanut in the crease of the seat that that person sat on? There are peanuts on just about every airline flight in the world - what are they going to do??
By the way, on a funny note, I was telling my good friend, who I roomed with on our church retreat a couple weekends ago about this incident/post. She has 4 year old twins, one of whom is allergic to peanuts, and a baby. As I was telling her what happened she said to me, "And do you know WHY they took peanut butter cookies off the list?" I said, no. She replied, "Because I called them!" She didn't call because of her son, she called because she runs the kids program for our women's ministry and was specifically told by the same people organizing this brunch that there are to be absolutely NO PEANUT PRODUCTS in the children's area. Now, the brunch won't be in the children's area, but I just thought it was interesting that the reasoning behind all this really had nothing to do with anyone having a peanut allergy and everything to do with principle, which is my point exactly!
Of course, we both laughed ourselves silly over the whole thing. Like you have said, it's not that big of a deal whether you have peanut butter cookies or not, but the truth is if someone is allergic to nuts/peanuts, they won't be touching anything someone else baked, period. So even though I'm now bringing brownies and not peanut butter cookies, it's really not going to benefit anyone I'm making that change for anyway!
Me again. I need to get a blogger ID for my peanut rants.
As far as airlines, I can't be certain that some PA travellers aren't just showing up and asking for Peanut-free flights, but I can tell you from what I've seen on the PA board I frequent, many travellers do call ahead (several calls usually) and they still get met with blank stares when they arrive at the gate. The info just doesn't get passed along. And I think sometimes people end up flying on different airlines (through no fault of their own - some airlines shift passengers around, it sounds like). I don't think it's fair either that passengers don't get a snack when PA travellers are on board. The airline should have an alternative snack.
Those leftover peanut crumbs ARE a huge concern. I see some PA travellers actually bring their own seat covers.
It's not something I've had to deal with but to me, this is the most limiting aspect of PA I see in my son's future - up in the air with recycled air and peanut crumbs seems to be the most vulnerable position I can imagine him in. I always wanted my child to have the old world open to him. This makes me sad that something so exciting (travel) might be frightening, maybe even dangerous for him.
Now... we're on to something! A peanut free airline! Of course, they'd have to stop short of calling it that due to the fact that there will be passengers who sneak peanut products on a plane. It would be nice, though, for an airline to not serve peanut products. It's really not hard!! We've been at this peanut-free preschool and had plenty of snacks! Imagine all the people who would love to know that at least they won't be serving peanuts on their planes - could be a cash cow!
I still think out of two allergies - peanut or egg - that egg would so much harder other than the fact that eggs have no odor to my knowledge. I've know children who have a peanut reaction from just smelling peanuts. The egg one surprised me - because I thought an egg allergic reaction was just a rash. I had no idea it was anaphalactic shock. That is huge, as eggs are in everything! I think that one would drive me crazy!!
We only have mold to deal with. That one sends us to the ER every time. If my daughter breaths in one spore even her inhalers are useless. Unfortunately, it is impossible to monitor contact with mold. It's everywhere - all over her school, but in places she shouldn't have any contact with it. It's just that one time... but I just warn everyone and we go from there!
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